UK experts offer advice for supporting children throughout the school year 

LEXINGTON, Ky. (Sept. 3, 2026) — As K-12 students settle into a new school year, parents and caregivers are adjusting, too. Questions about friendships, homework and anxiety can leave families wondering how best to support their children without adding to the pressure. 

UKNow asked University of Kentucky College of Education experts Meagan Scott, Ph.D., and Jena Hinds, Ph.D. for practical advice on some of the challenges families may encounter during the school year. 

Scott is an assistant professor in the Department of Educational, School, and Counseling Psychology. Hinds is a clinical assistant professor in the Department of Teaching and Learning. 

UKNow: What can parents and caregivers do to help their child feel connected at school? 

Hinds: Many parents and caregivers worry about whether their child will make friends and feel included. They can support their child’s sense of belonging by asking thoughtful, low pressure questions. Instead of asking, “Did you make any friends today?” try asking, “What was the best part of your day?” “Who or what made you smile?” or “Did you notice any kindness today?” You might also ask, “Who did you enjoy being around?” or “When did you feel most comfortable?” These questions invite children to share their experiences without making friendship feel like another task they must accomplish. Ask only one or two questions at a time, listen without immediately trying to solve the situation, and allow your child to respond at their own pace. Most importantly, remind them that they belong and do not need to change who they are to be accepted.

UKNow: Many parents and caregivers say their child is bright but struggles to stay organized. How can they help if their child is constantly forgetting homework, losing papers or missing assignments?  

Scott: Caregivers and parents can use a few strategies to help their child stay organized. One helpful strategy for physical materials (worksheets, papers) is to create an organizational checklist for your child. At home or at school, your child can check off each item they need and make sure it goes in the assigned folders or binders in their backpack. The checklist can be a paper or digital version. Parents and caregivers can also make sure there is a clear place to engage with homework and assignments (e.g., the dining room, your child’s bedroom) so all materials are expected to be in one specific area.

For digital homework or assignments, it may help to collaborate with your child to identify tasks that need to be done immediately and those that require more time and preparation. Helping children prioritize their homework and assignments can help with task initiation. To build momentum, encourage your child to start with easier tasks and praise their efforts; then break larger tasks into smaller ones to increase progress (but don’t forget to include breaks in between tasks). 

UKNow: What should parents and caregivers do if homework becomes a regular source of stress and conflict at home? 

Hinds: If homework regularly causes stress and conflict, parents and caregivers should pause before pushing their child to continue. Although we may feel that an assignment must be completed within a certain timeframe, that schedule should not be set in stone. Offer a brain break to help your child regulate their nervous system before returning to the work. This might include taking a walk, playing, drawing, listening to music, reading or journaling.  

When a child is stressed, the brain focuses more on responding to the perceived threat, making it harder to concentrate, remember information, solve problems and think clearly. A break is not a way to avoid the assignment. It can restore focus, confidence and readiness to learn. Parents should also notice which tasks create the most stress and communicate openly with the teacher, who may suggest strategies, clarify expectations or provide additional support. 

UKNow: How should parents and caregivers respond when a child becomes so anxious about school that they refuse to go or repeatedly ask to stay home?  

Scott: School refusal due to anxiety is a common issue that many families face. My first advice for addressing school refusal would be to have a conversation with your child to identify any underlying causes of stress and anxiety. For many children, being separate from their parents/caregiver can cause worry, fear or a need to stay home; for others, something at school may be causing significant stress that your child is trying to avoid. 

I recommend paying attention to the small things your child shares about their school experiences. For instance, a child may say that their school is “too loud” or over-stimulating, and that they would rather stay at home. In this instance, parents and caregivers can work with school personnel to see whether there are options for their child to wear noise-canceling headphones to encourage the child to return to school. Family-school collaboration will be important to address stress and anxiety stemming from the school, so that children can reintegrate into a supportive and accepting environment.

Another suggestion for school refusal is to create a predictable, structured morning routine from when the child wakes up to when the child enters the school building, which will require collaboration with school personnel to ensure everyone is on the same page. When creating a routine, caregivers/parents can co-develop step-by-step tasks with their child that need to be completed, and for each task, you can provide praise or rewards for completing it. Gradual achievement will be key because there may be days when your child can’t complete all the steps, and that is okay as long as they are making progress. You will want to make sure the goal gradually increases until your child is able to reintegrate back into school. 

UKNow: Many parents and caregivers would like to be more involved at school but simply don’t have the time. What’s the biggest impact they can make, even with a busy schedule?  

Scott: I believe one of the biggest impacts parents and caregivers can make, even with limited time, is ensuring an effective, established two-way communication system between you and the school. Life is always going to be busy, and many folks do not have the time to be highly involved; thus, a system that outlines what is happening at your child’s school and allows direct messaging with school staff helps you stay informed in a more accessible way.

Additionally, having conversations about school with your child can have a significant impact. Just asking your children how their day at school was can show that you are interested in their lives and are invested in their educational experience. These conversations also help you better understand what is happening at school and the social, academic and behavioral expectations your child has to navigate.  

Some children will reply with “Okay” when you ask how school went; however, that is okay, especially as they get older. The key thing is to let them know that you are available to talk about school-related topics. To help with limited one-word answers, you may want to ask more specific questions, such as “What happened during soccer practice today?” “What was your favorite part of school today? Your least favorite?” “Do you plan on going to the upcoming football game?” “Did anything interesting happen today at school?” “How was lunch/recess/specials today?” and “Who did you hang out with today?” These questions will vary depending on your child’s age, but the key thing is to give your child your undivided attention when they share with you so they know you are listening. 

UKNow: It’s easy to worry about doing everything right as a parent or caregiver. If they could focus on just one thing to support their child’s success this school year, what should it be? 

Hinds: The one thing I would suggest parents and caregivers focus on is creating a safe space for their child to share what is happening at school and in their life. Begin building this communication early, because as children progress through school, they may encounter more complicated academic, social and emotional challenges. When they know home is a safe place, they are more likely to share difficult experiences. Give your child time to talk, listen without judgment and resist the urge to solve every problem immediately. Sometimes children simply need to feel seen, heard and understood. You might ask, “Would you like me to listen, help you find a solution or give you some space?” Parents do not have to do everything perfectly; a consistent, supportive relationship can make a meaningful difference.